Put Those Cars in Row Again and I Will Panic

Every time anyone puts anything in a row around here I FREAK OUT. Did you know that lining things up is an early sign of Autism? Well it is. And since I have a son with speech and language issues (also an indicator) I have an eagle eye for toys lined up. Do all kids do this? Yes. It's called categorizing and is an important part of development, but the thing about having a kid with any kind of disorder means you are living in fear that they will uncover something else. Or that another one of your children will have it, or something worse.

One of the bigger fears I hold is having a child on "The Spectrum." Autism and Asperger's are scary. They are scary because there are a lot of theories about how you get them, and theories about what to do once you have them, but it's not a direct road. There is no A+B = success, no cure. So the Mom's are left to try on therapies until they find one that fits, and hopefully helps. It's daunting. My heart goes out to the Mom's who support their kids through this maze. They aren't just trying to find help, they are trying to unlock the chains around their own children. On a much smaller scale, I know how hard that can be.

When my kids don't answer me after I call their name, or they are avoiding eye contact, I get a little surge of anxiety. God forbid one of them starts flapping their hands (aka self stimulating). I know that getting the diagnosis is the easy (emotionally debilitating) part, but then you can more on and start fighting for your child (less crying with your family, more crying in Dr's offices). But I am always asking for reassurance Mini Boots is not included in the 1 of every 94 boys diagnosed. That number is even higher for military families. Although most likely it would have presented itself already, and thankfully has not, I have another little boy coming up in the ranks. I feel the need for continued vigilance.

In my life I have had a couple of friends whose children clearly had something going on, but they, the parents, were in denial. They couldn't admit it, thought the child would grow out of it, and made excuses not to address whatever it was. But in that scenario the only one punished is the child. If they are not diagnosed, they can not receive help. And I refuse to be one of those Mom's who lets fear paralyze them. If you think something might be going on, put on your big girl panties and deal, because the only one who will pay for your denial is that sweet helpless child of yours.