Epic Fail: Mommyhood

I am seriously failing at this Mommyhood game. Last week I committed to feeding Mighty Mouse breakfast, and didn't actually do it until sunday morning. I forgot to put napkins in the lunch boxes, again. I almost loose my mind at 5:30 pm... every night. (For reals. It's like a set your watch by the near Mommy break down daily activity). And today I found out that Little Britches homework is not an opportunity to practice at home but a graded assignment. Which we have not turned in. All year.

Why it didn't occur to me that homework was to be turned in is beyond me. I am, in fact, familiar with the concept of homework. I did actually go to school and get assigned homework myself. I have actually talked to other Mom's who discuss homework and that it does have due dates. But for some reason when she came home with homework I thought "Ohhh fun! How thoughtful of her teachers to give us extra work to do at home... and never turn in." Today my FIVE year old finally said to me, "Can I bring my work to school today?" And I said "Sure." I put it in her bag and sent her off without a second thought. After school her Teacher came up to me and said "Little Britches was really excited to be able to turn in her work. Thanks for remembering." I am pretty sure I heard "For the first time ever you lazy terrible Mom" under her breath. Beet red I stammered out "Uhhhh, I didn't realize it was graded, I am so sorry. Really sorry. Oh my Lord. But we have all of it, I mean we totally did all of it, and uh, I mean I just didn't realize... I'm really so, so sorry."

Tonight we will be digging out her work, praying I didn't accidentally throw any of it away and sheepishly handing in a huge pile of work tomorrow. My only hope is the teacher takes pity on my poor daughter and backdates some stickers, because she obviously doesn't deserve to be punished for having a rotten (and also dumb) mother. So yeah. I am failing at Mommyhood.