Can you spell MOM?

It's 7 am. I got to bed at 1 am. To put it mildly, I am exhausted. Normally my daughter comes in to my room, crawls in bed and tells me about her dreams, and what she wants to eat for breakfast. Her suggestion is usually something outrageous like pineapple pancakes. I then attempt to portray the deliciousness of a big bowl of Rice Krispie's because Mommy is not a morning person and there is no way I am stirring batter and flipping 'cakes till I have had at least two cups of coffee. But this is no usual morning....

"MOOOOMMMMM! Harrison pooped, P-O-O-P. Pooped. And it is REEAAALLLY stinkey." Oy. This is how my day began, and I was not impressed. OK, OK, was I impressed that she could spell poop? Yes. But this is also disturbing. Not only do I have to get out of bed to change an apparently very stinky poopey diaper immediately, but my not even four year old is spelling. And this just presents all kinds of problems.

I married a sailor and I can curse with the best of them. When I had to give up swearing in front of my kids, I missed it, but at least I could get my point across to anyone who could read if I needed to. And now even that level of freedom seems to be slipping away. How am I going to talk to their father about wheather or not we should have ice cream for dessert? How will I tell my Mom what Santa is building in his workshop for Christmas? How will I tell my best friend that there was a real A-S-S-H-O-L-E working at the jiffy lube?

I could embrace the "do as I say not as I do" attitude, but anyone who's had their 18mo old saying "Ohhh Shit" knows this won't work. (And yes that was when I decided I needed to spell my dirty words, it was one the the funniest and adorable if inappropriate things my daughter has ever done. I still laugh thinking about it). My only other option is to clean up my mouth. That doesn't sound like any fun at all but that's the thing about kids, they turn you into the adults you swore you'd never be.

So, I got up, changed a diaper and made pancakes (not pineapple, but still...) and began mourning another piece of my carefree youthful attitude. As I was serving them to an anxious pair, Evelyn said "Mom, I love you. I want to give you a kiss, K-I-S kiss." I melted, and got over the loss of my beloved curse words in that moment, and embraced the adult I should be.